# The pleasure of not being good at something.



## Alain De Vos (Mar 18, 2021)

When we are born we are good at some specific stuff. I have been a teacher 1000's students so I know. But this is not my question.
My question is what are you not good at, but nonetheless this thing gives you interest, pleasure, meaning, value,  in life. It could be anything.


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## eternal_noob (Mar 18, 2021)

I love plants and gardening but i am not good at it. All my plants eventually wither because i forget to water them.
But i have a lot of them and it enjoys me to take care of them. (In a way).


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## Sevendogsbsd (Mar 18, 2021)

Sports of any kind, with the exception of golf, which I enjoy despite my "badness" at it.


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## Mjölnir (Mar 18, 2021)

Alain De Vos said:


> When we are born we are good at some specific stuff.


No, but I guess you mean our genetical preset commonly called _talent_.


Alain De Vos said:


> I have been a teacher 1000's students so I know.


May I kindly ask for your subject/domain?


Alain De Vos said:


> My question is what are you not good at, but nonetheless this thing gives you interest, pleasure, meaning, value,  in life. It could be anything.


When I was an adolescent, my uncle - himself suffering from dislexia - teached me: _"Nerd/geek/swat/wonk/smug/grind is not an invective, but sycophant/bootlicker/asshamster is.  Strain yourself & let the others be mediocre!"_ and he showed me all kinds of hacks & tricks concerning DIY, espc. about technical systems: cars & motorcycles, basic electrical DIY & the like.  I'm not an expert in any of these domains, but I enjoy beeing able to fix common issues & not have "five thumbs on each hand".  It took me decades to overcome the subtle elitism resulting from this school paired with my talent in mathematics (which is BTW well below the true wizzards), and value the mediocrity that naturally we all have in most domains.

Last not least, the one thing I honour the most is _passion_.  Even when passion is applied in a mediocre way, the resulting piece of work will inherently bear some beauty, isn't that true?

P.S.: Everyone can sing, but not everyone has a good voice.  Making music, singing & drumming is among the most joyful, satisfying, archaic & healthy human actions.


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## scottro (Mar 18, 2021)

I've heard a saying that anything worth doing, is worth doing badly. I was clumsy and took  up martial arts and dance. I'm still clumsy but at least I felt I was doing something about it. So, in my somewhat arrogant opinion, yes, if it gives you pleasure, and isn't hurting others, do it.

I do remember one day at the karate doujou, where, as a brown belt, I was one of the ones in the first row for beginners to watch.That same day, I took my first ballet class and was really nervous. Then, I thought of how nervous I'd been the first day at the doujou, and though, Gee, I felt the same there, and today, I was one of the ones for the beginners to watch. (Not that I was exceptional, but at least I knew the basics. Actually in Japanese I was able to make a good pun because doujou, aside from a training hall, also means sympathy, so I would say doujou de (due to sympathy) doujou de (at the doujou) I got a brown belt. 

But the serious point is, that we are all beginners at something at some point.  I remember a co-worker, unfamiliar with a simple procedure we had. I showed it to them, and they said, Oh, that's easy, and I said, lots of things are easy once you know how to do them.


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## olli@ (Mar 18, 2021)

When I bought an Oculus Quest, everyone told me I’d have to download Beat Saber. So I did, and it turned out to be incredible fun. Probably the best game I’ve ever had (well, the “Vader’s Dojo” part of the Vader Immortal series is addictive, too). I’m really not particularly good at it, even though I’ve been playing it regularly for quite some time. I think this is a good example of something that is fun and that you really enjoy, even though you’re not good at it. As a side effect, it is a nice workout and even helped with my muscle tension.

Edit: Uhm … now that I re-read what I wrote, it almost sounds like advertising. That’s certainly not my intention. Sorry for that.


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## Mjölnir (Mar 18, 2021)

Thx for reminding me on games!  I'm very bad at playing chess, nevertheless it's one of my most beloved hobbies.  Chess is more than a game: it's a cultural artifact property.


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## eternal_noob (Mar 18, 2021)

scottro said:


> karate ... ballet


Nice mix! I like it. 

My mix was karate and fishing. Can recommend.


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## olli@ (Mar 18, 2021)

eternal_noob said:


> Nice mix! I like it.


Here’s mine:  VR games (Oculus Quest) and Lego.


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## Alexander88207 (Mar 18, 2021)

The game Counter-Strike. I am not good at it but still fun.


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## Crivens (Mar 18, 2021)

Due to eye problems at a young age, I have no 3D vision. But I like aviation. So I used to fly RC planes. Now with kids this is a no-go. Balsa and little probing fingers don't mix.


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## leebrown66 (Mar 18, 2021)

I can't cut a piece of wood straight, Dad was a master.  I flew RC planes with him, but he built them all.  That was how we started to connect.


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## Deleted member 30996 (Mar 18, 2021)

If I can't do it well I don't want to do it at all.

I can't draw a picture by hand you wouldn't mistake as the work of someone in Kindergarten. But I can use graphics/gimp well enough to suit me. 

Although it took me longer to figure out than Linux.


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## scottro (Mar 18, 2021)

Oddly enough, to me, when I would mention doing ballet to help my karate, other dancers would say, that's weird. But most martial artists understood the connection quite well.
Further food for thought, I actually started martial arts after reading an old book on cats. The authors wrote something like Nijinsky cannot outjump a bullet and DiMaggio can't hit an atom bomb out of Yankee Stadium (shows the general age of the book) but a cat's athletic ability has a purpose. When I read that, and watching my kittens play at the time, I thought I wanted to do something that helped with agility and also had a concrete purpose.  The ballet came years later, when I was less worried about being able to have a practical application for training.  (Also, when I began ballet, I was single, and quickly noticed that even the adult classes were 95 percent women, another incentive to keep up with it.)


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## Crivens (Mar 18, 2021)

scottro You know that Jackie Chan went to a school for dance and martial arts? It is quite common.


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## garry (Mar 18, 2021)

Alain De Vos said:


> When we are born we are good at some specific stuff. I have been a teacher 1000's students so I know. But this is not my question.
> My question is what are you not good at, but nonetheless this thing gives you interest, pleasure, meaning, value,  in life. It could be anything.


I get a kind of high from math ... I remember walking along an ocean beach contemplating the proof of some theorem in group theory.  It was so pleasant that I remember that walk many years later.

There is nothing so beautiful as the precision of thought of Euclid's Elements.  

But I failed trigonometry in high school and had to repeat the subject in summer school, pulled a D in differential equations I in second year college and only avoided "flunking out" by committing to get at least a B in differential equations II, failed the mid-term exam in group theory in grad school.  One could easily say that I'm not "good at math".  I just love to think about math in my own time, on my own terms.


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## Hakaba (Mar 18, 2021)

Chess. I like see a good game and understand a lot of strategy. But I failed to organize more than 5 pieces and I often let some piece in one.

Mechanics. I only disassemble parts, clean it and reassemble... But I see a lot of hacks or real fix and I am impressed (ok, I do not have the rights tools...but I feel that I do not have the skills to)

And a lot of domains that Ibhardlybtry but failed (and accept that). Special mention : drawing, playong music and English speaking.


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## Mjölnir (Mar 18, 2021)

Usually it's more than enough to remember that an _Abel's group_ is s/th different than a magic _ring_...
Hakaba, please challenge me on LiChess.org.  I'm, Walter_von_Entferndt.  I only play correspondence chess, let's say 7 days/move.  Or 5 if you insist on less.


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## scottro (Mar 18, 2021)

Crivens, yes, and Bruce Lee was a cha cha champion. As I said, it was the dancers that didn't understand it.


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## Mjölnir (Mar 18, 2021)

Alain De Vos , now this is going to be one of the most funny while still seriously interesting threads this month, and once again one of those with a very intelligent question posed by you to us.  Can we have some background on your profession & why you're interested in such questions?  And, of course, the background of this particular question?


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## rootbert (Mar 19, 2021)

acting as DJ. I have done that professionally, and I was not too bad. However, it was exhausting, and I could not imagine doing this for a longer period of time ... I just wanted to make people dance and go crazy when I also was in that mood. After that I had some occasional contracts, but I was always ashamed because I knew how all that stuff worked, but I was not able to perform as well as I was able to beforehand. I missed the beats, did horrible things when mixing, but nevertheless my selection of tracks was always really awesome and the whole croud went (100-2000 persons) mad in front of me ... I still like that ;-)


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## Deleted member 30996 (Mar 19, 2021)

scottro said:


> Oddly enough, to me, when I would mention doing ballet to help my karate, other dancers would say, that's weird. But most martial artists understood the connection quite well.
> Further food for thought, I actually started martial arts after reading an old book on cats.


A monk went into a cave, sat down facing the wall for 1 year and when he came out he had developed a fighting system based on animals and insects movements that became known as kung-fu. Almost all the styles are named in that manner and use movements like the animals. As seen Saturday afternoons on Kung-Fu Theatre. coming soon to a TV near you.

I recommend the movie Yip Man, a movie about Bruce Lee's Sifu, starring Donnie Yen. While under Japanese Occupation he fights 10 Japanese black belts at once and a good example in difference of styles, and what 1 guy at that skill level can really do against multiple opponents.

What style did you train in, scottro? When and where did you go to school? Who you trained under and their rank all of interest to me. Is your wife a kung-fu girl? I thought all student in Chinese schools learned wushu.

David Carradine got his start as a ballet dancer and got the part as Cain instead of Bruce Lee starring in Kung-Fu. He looked too Chinese for the part of a Shaolin monk. Logic, it's not just for breakfast. Jackie Chan was a member of the Peking Chinese Opera and can be seen using several different styles.

I'm a Purple belt in Shotokan (Shoto =Pine Waves, kan = Hall) and my Sensei both Nidan). We learn and test on the 5 Heian kata(Peace and Calmness) and that takes you from white to purple belt. Then, in theory, you are supposed to be "effective against 10 men". I considered 3 people against me in the street a fair fight, but that was in the 80's and I was in my 30's. I still hold rank and have my Certificate of Rank signed in 1987 hanging on the wall.

Now I'm 64 years old, shouldn't have to fight anymore and not many want to when you're known for beating 3 people up, but that's something forgotten and needs renewed every 3-4 years. You would never guess I was the geek I am by looks and am pretty scary looking they say. Poor drhowarddfine is still recovering from the shock of seeing my photo.


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## scottro (Mar 19, 2021)

I did Kyokushin. Then, the head of the school and his nephew split, the head in Japan, the nephew in the US. I stopped, then did it again at the nephew's school. Basically same thing as Kyokushin, though not as tough as I'd remembered it.  My wife is Japanese, not Chinese. She was (and still is, even in her 60's) a dancer, though she did taijutsu (which is supposedly from old time ninjutsu, in the Bujinkan, Hatsumi sensei's version, if you're familiar with the taijutsu stuff).  In Junior High, I think, she did some kendou but not very seriously, just as part of gym class.


A few years ago, I had to have surgery, so, though I still train by myself a bit at home, can't really punch hard or kick high anymore.  I'm also in my 60's, and can't say, even in my 20's through 40's that I was a good fighter. I'm a wimp, even with the training.


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## Deleted member 30996 (Mar 19, 2021)

I quit going to School in 1987 but that was 10hours class a week and 10 miles riding my mountain bike.Sometimes in Saturdays we would go to St. Louis and train with my Sesei teacher Vito Rollo, a Sandan. drhowarddfine may have seen him do something he is known for. Don't ever honk your horn at the guy in front of you in a traffic jam, Doc.. .

In 1990 my wife called me at work and said her ex-hubby and his brother were outside honking the horn, pounding on the door of the house and she was scared to Death. I was Manager of a Group Home so I could come get her and bring her to work. When I picked her up I got my gymbag with a change of clothes, combat boots and leather jacket because I was going to take care of business and make sure I never got another call like that from her again business of the day.

Long story short, her ex his brother and and a friend came ove to my house to beat me down, The 2 brothers were 300lb rednecks and the other guy my size. I was 183lbs of muscle, bone and fast. Fast hands why they gave me the name jitte in school as a term of endearment from my Sensei. We had never met before that day so I introduced them to 10Hands.

I beat them bloody and never got hit once, I can't dance but taught them how to the tune of combat boots. They went to the Hospital to get stiched up and and I went to jail for 1st Degree Assault. They tried to hit me with the car and finally all 3 got hold of me and tried to force me into their car. I looked in and saw a pair of handcuffs hanging from the rear view mirror. I knew if I got in that car I'd never get out and there was no way they were going to get me in that car. That's when I hit a gear I didn't even know I had and really started fighting then.

So they were going to kill me or I was going to kill them to survive. Nobody died but the desire to fight me one on one was DOA. My boss was a bigshot and I was the Fair Haired Boy, He drove from Bolivar across the State and went to bat for me, convinced the Prosecutor there was something in me he saw worth saving and 30 years in the slammer became 5 years probation just like that.

I successfully completed every day of my 5 year Probation. My Pronation Officer liked me a little more than she should and had I know she would leave her hubby for a woman I'd have made a move on her. Have and haven't been in a fight since 1990. Divorced the wife, upgraded and married a self-described Nymphomaniac who met her match (It looks good on my resume) divorced her and next month will have 25 years in since I quit drinking,


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## scottro (Mar 19, 2021)

Sounds like an interesting past.  Can't say I envy it, but it certainly has some things to respect as a martial artist.  And good for you for putting things together for yourself. It sounds like a simple thing when you write it, but that's one thing I do know from experience, it isn't easy.


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